5 Years Gone

How did I mark the 5th anniversary of my mother’s death? With tears, of course. And music, as I naturally do. With memories, and smiles, and more tears. With an amazingly productive day of Strategic Planning at the organisation where she once worked, and where she brought as much passion as I now bring, in her own … More 5 Years Gone

Shattered

Broken shards of glass spread across the kitchen floor – jagged edges glistening, and tiny slivers hiding in shadows, evading my later attempts to make the tiles safe once more for tender feet (how quickly we imbue our human qualities of spite and craftiness into objects inanimate). The sound crashes into my consciousness before I … More Shattered

Echoes

Sitting at the kitchen table working on my laptop after the children’s bedtime routines had been completed and the dinner plates cleared away, I put music on to play as I always do in the evenings, whether to help me concentrate on the task at hand, or provide a soothing backdrop to more relaxing pursuits. … More Echoes

Futility

I am having one of those rare days when, out of the blue and for no obvious reason, everything seems pointless. Empty. Void of meaning or purpose. I saw an old man earlier, barely able to walk slowly up the street with the assistance of his walking stick, and I suddenly felt as though I … More Futility

Lesotho Memories

When I turned on my phone on Monday morning the first email to come through was from an old friend of my mother’s. She had recently signed up to my blog, and had emailed to introduce herself. Reading over her words evoked memories full of the powerful emotions of childhood. I was four when we … More Lesotho Memories

A Year Has Passed…

The excitement and anticipation of climbing onto an aeroplane for a weekend of new experiences with an old friend has its own unique thrill. Here, in the space between leaving and arriving, I find a moment of calm in which to begin to piece together the past few weeks. The anniversary of my mother’s death … More A Year Has Passed…

Tearless Distraction

I have been unconsciously distracting myself from the rapidly-approaching first anniversary of my mother’s death, which will arrive all too soon on May 31st. I have become busy again with many projects and plans, being productive and constructive and feeling increasingly connected to my body and the world around me, in new and surprising ways. … More Tearless Distraction